Message from the office:
I do enjoy reading short and invaluable parenting or educational articles. This extract is an example of one of them that I would like to share with you this week.
It so important to raise children who are able to bounce back from life’s disappointments and who do not give up when times get tough. The following are tips of what NOT to do as a parent, taken from https://www.mother.ly/child/mentally-strong-kids-have-parents-who-refuse-to-do-these-13-things and I am sure will help ensure that you raise children who are able to overcome the challenges that they will face each day. Therefore DO NOT…
1. Allow a victim mentality: Let’s teach our children that sometimes rejection, failure and unfairness are a part of life.
2. Parenting out of guilt: Show your girls that even though you feel guilty sometimes—and all good parents do—you’re not going to allow your uncomfortable emotions get in the way of making wise decisions.
3. Making your children the center of the universe: If you make your entire life revolve around your children, they’ll grow up thinking everyone should cater to them. And self-absorbed, entitled adults aren’t likely to get very far in life. Teach your children to focus on what they have to offer the world, rather than what they can gain from it.
4. Allowing fear to dictate choices: Although keeping your children inside a protective bubble will spare you a lot of anxiety, playing it too safe teaches your child that fear must be avoided at all times. Show your daughter that the best way to conquer fear is to face it head-on, and you’ll raise courageous girls who are willing to step outside their comfort zones.
5. Giving children too much power: Letting your children dictate what the family will eat for dinner or where the family goes on holiday gives them more power than they are developmentally ready to handle. Treating them like an equal, or the boss, actually robs them of mental strength. Give your girls an opportunity to practice taking orders, listening to things they don’t want to hear, and doing things they don’t want to do. Let your children make simple choices while still maintaining a clear family hierarchy.
6. Expecting perfection: Expecting your child to perform well is healthy, but expecting them to be perfect will backfire. Teach your girls that it’s okay to fail. It’s fine, and normal, not to be great at everything they do. Girls who strive to become the best version of themselves, rather than the best at everything, won’t make their self-worth dependent upon how they measure up to others.
7. Letting children avoid responsibility: Children who perform age-appropriate duties aren’t overburdened, they’re gaining the mental strength they need to become responsible citizens.
8. Shielding children from pain: Hurt feelings, sadness and anxiety are part of life. Letting your girls experience those painful feelings gives them opportunities to practice tolerating discomfort. Provide them with the guidance and support they need to deal with pain so they can gain confidence in their ability to handle life’s inevitable hardships.
9. Feeling responsible for their child’s emotions: Cheering your girls up when they’re sad and calming them down when they’re upset means you take responsibility for regulating their emotions. Children need to gain emotional competence so they can learn to manage their own feelings. Proactively teach your child healthy ways to cope with their emotions so they don’t depend on others to do it for them.
10. Preventing children from making mistakes: Correcting your daughter’s homework, double checking to make sure they’ve packed their lunch, and constantly reminding them to do their chores won’t do them any favours. Natural consequences can be some of life’s greatest teachers. Let your children mess up sometimes and show them how to learn from their mistakes so they can grow wiser and become stronger.
11. Confusing discipline with punishment: Punishment involves making children suffer for their wrongdoing. Discipline, however, is about teaching them how to do better in the future. Raising a child who fears “getting in trouble” isn’t the same as raising a child who wants to make good choices. Use consequences that help your daughters develop the self-discipline they need to make better choices.
12. Taking shortcuts to avoid discomfort: Although giving in to a whining child or doing your daughter’s chores for her will make your life a little easier right now, those shortcuts instill unhealthy habits in your child for the long term. Role model delayed gratification and show your girls that you can resist tempting shortcuts. You’ll teach them they’re strong enough to persevere even when they want to give up.
13. Losing sight of their values: Many parents aren’t instilling the values they hold dear in their children. Instead, they’re so wrapped up in the day-to-day chaos of life that they forget to look at the bigger picture. Make sure your priorities accurately reflect the things you value most in life, and you’ll give your children the strength to live a meaningful life.
End of term:
Please note that although exams end on the 19th November, the last day of school is the 4th December.We do expect your daughter to be at school to attend the many functions and events that we have after exams. Teach your daughter to see things through and be committed to the end. This includes attending the functions they are expected to be at. I do know they will really enjoy them!
‘Parents and teachers build resilience when they gently push young people to the edges of their intellectual, emotional, social, and physical comfort zones. When adults support and encourage youth as they take risks, face obstacles, and grow from failure, young people learn how to bounce back from life’s ups and downs.’ Marilyn Price-Mitchell, PhD
On Friday, 22 November we will have a Farewell Assembly for Mrs Sonne. The assembly will be at 11:30 in the hall.
Grade 00, R & 1 Orientation
The 2020 Grade 00, R and 1s will be visiting us on Friday, 22 November. The new Gr 1s will be here at 09:30-11:00 and the Gr 00 & R’s at 14:30-15:30
. We look forward to welcoming our new additions to the VP family and introducing the girls who are already at the VP Pre-primary to their new teachers and show them their classrooms for next year!
Our school Carol Service is on Thursday, 21 November at 17:30 in the Glennie Hall. Both the Junior and Senior Choir as well as the Graeme College Choir and our Orchestra will be performing at the service. This is a special school event and all Gr. 4-7 girls are encouraged to attend. Parents are most welcome to join us, we would love to have you there to support your daughters and enjoy the evening with us. Girls may come dressed in smart civvies.
The Grade 2s will be going on their outing to Shamwari on Thursday (Cox class) and Friday (Ryan class). They will be leaving by bus from school after lines and are expected to return around 13:30. The girls are expected to be neatly dressed in their school uniform and they need to bring enough lunch and water.
Many thanks to Kimberly Oosthuizen for the most generous donation of books to the library.
The Kind Club is selling raffle tickets to raise money for the Child Welfare Children for Children Campaign. Tickets are R5 and you could win a big Christmas Chocolate Hamper!
We would like to wish the following girls a very happy birthday for next week: Chelsy van der Merwe, Qhawe Mdolomba, Isiphile Ngcebetsha, Ludwe Ngcebetsha, Viola Stoloff, Bronté Agnew, Hailey de Clercq, Owekhethelo Gongqa, Anita Nkanyana, Joyly Chikiwa, Ella Chirombo, Iva Mqhayi-Malindi, Iminqweno Fulani, Mbalenhle Menziwa, Kayla Page, Sawo Papu, Maham Rizvi and Maia Page.
Mrs M Rafferty